how to actually change someone's mind pdf

While recognizing the power of storytelling, we also need to recognize its limits. Compare Standard and Premium Digital here. Much of leadership boils down to turning adversaries into allies. I think we both probably agree on a lot of the same problems in this world. Here, experts share research-backed strategies that can help you actually change someones mind. Many of us have, and with high-stakes elections looming, the already fiery discourse will likely only intensify. Research published in 2016 supports that notion: Door-to-door canvassers who were advocating for trans rights engaged in deep reflection with voters about transphobia, talking about their experiences and views, and these conversations substantially reduced the voters transphobia for the next three months, as measured by follow-up surveys. Leadership. Let our global subject matter experts broaden your perspective with timely insights and opinions you Direct advice might backfire, causing the person to back off or resist. It is a tool with measurable utility, not just an object for aesthetic admiration. Much of leadership boils down to turning adversaries into allies. 1. Our tendency is to want to hide that, but owning up to the fact that youre nervous is actually helpful, because it tends to soften people., Research by Gray and others, published in Nature Human Behavior in September, provides additional helpful guidance: Dont assume the person youre talking to hates you, even if you hold different political views. <> For cost savings, you can change your plan at any time online in the Settings & Account section. Many of us have, and with high-stakes elections looming, the already fiery discourse will likely only intensify. There are ways to get your point across more effectively. AddThis sets this cookie to track page visits, sources of traffic and share counts. Sustained change in behavior can be the final prize. a4~B=o*aO? Though it might feel satisfying in the moment, calling someone a bleepinginsert your favorite derogatory term hereis never going to help them understand your point of view. In this piece, the authors discuss three persuasion strategies leaders can employ when faced with a disagreement in the workplace: the Cognitive Conversation, which is best for convincing colleagues focused on the rational reasons behind a decision, the Champion Conversation . Change the plan you will roll onto at any time during your trial by visiting the Settings & Account section. offers FT membership to read for free. How to Actually Change Someone's Mind October 27, 2022 website builder Raise your hand if you've recently engaged in an insult-slinging argument that started as an attempt at a civil discussion about some hot-button issue. % $8.95. A more scientific answer can be found in Brian Boyds wonderful book, On the Origin of Stories: Evolution, Cognition, and Fiction, (Harvard University Press, 2009). Leadership involves making unpopular decisions while navigating complex relationships with colleagues, partners . Research shows that correcting that one misconceptionthat the other side doesnt hate your side as much as you thoughtis a really powerful way to reduce partisan animosity.. To Change Someone's Mind, Stop Talking and Listen. The whole experiment can be seen as a success to the extent that the material standard of living of a proportion of the worlds population for a time improved. AddThis sets this geolocation cookie to help understand the location of users who share the information. Yet leadership storytelling, when done right, at least gives us a fighting chance of success. YouTube sets this cookie to store the video preferences of the user using embedded YouTube video. Home; Love Spells; Money Spells; African love spells; Voodoo Spells -sOutputFile=? Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This cookie, set by YouTube, registers a unique ID to store data on what videos from YouTube the user has seen. He thinks of the strategy as ABC: agree before challenging. Rather than unilaterally force a single solution on others, give people the freedom and autonomy to choose from a few options. If you look comfortable and genuinely interested in what the other person is saying, no matter how much you disagree, the discussion's tension will be lowered. Rather, experts in persuasive communication say, its crucial to focus on curiosity and compassion, and to make it clear that you dont think the person youre talking to is the enemyor look down on them. Pose the request like this, Tamerius suggests: I want to have this conversation with you, but we cant have it if youre calling me names or questioning my motives. If the person youre talking to insults you, Campt recommends saying: I want to go back to just before you said X, and rewinding the conversation. This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. . The punctured global bike boom could yet receive a boost, The UK governments policy on public sector pay is foolish, ChatGPT is fluent, clever and dangerously creative, Immunocores Bahija Jallal: There was fantastic science, but without financing, we could not go anywhere, The great chip war and the challenge for global diplomacy, Account of the global chip battle wins FT book prize, Louise Richardson: I do wish our students were more resilient about nasty remarks, Lifting the lid on Delaware corporate Americas tax haven, The secret lives of MI6s top female spies, The inside story of Liz Trusss disastrous 44 days in office, The allure of Courmayeur: ski-home buyers find lower costs in Italy, My Dad Wrote a Porno podcast finally reaches its climax, The mysterious disappearance of Kiwi shoe polish. Research published in Psychological Science in October found that empathizing with the people you disagree with may make your political arguments more persuasive. These exercises can help us open up our hearts and foster the best possible environment for a tough conversation, he says. Certain strategies, however, can make the attempt more effective. Earn Their Trust. Many of us have, and with high-stakes elections looming, the already fiery discourse will likely only intensify. Instead, keep a healthy amount of detachment from the outcome. She recommends following these four steps: 1. Many people feel strongly about divisive issues but never stop to catalog the specific reasons why, McRaney says. 2022 TIME USA, LLC. When she joins a new conversation, Tamerius always introduces herself, telling others her name and that its nice to meet them. But people do not usually change their minds because they enjoy a show, nor even because of a dazzling display of logic. For this reason, the title of the latest HBR article, How To Change Anyones Mind is seriously misleading. Entering the conversation in the right mindset is keyand that means striving to be cool, calm, collected, and open to learning. Don't forget to maintain eye . Youre trying to learn, and to understand, he says, collecting information that youll utilize in the next conversation, and the one after that. Im wondering why on this particular issue we disagree, and Id love your permission to investigate that together.. Set boundaries. People change their minds because . If you do nothing, you will be auto-enrolled in our premium digital monthly subscription plan and retain complete access for 65 per month. Any opinions, findings, conclusions, or recommendations present in article comments are those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect the views of APS or the articles author. Omc-UC2|eqM}~ 3 o2f{oo7]3&/-WKsWqJ~n?xBmfA %pzb C2)5 X*>80gE;_+}1_`p}gx vx>]>P)8j% "E:9v8/M27&P$M pw:n;No'gC3NH!Hr#3'#AE:OqBNg If you thought business jargon was bad. Attention is the early reward that listeners bestow on the storyteller. Sharing and connecting on a human level was more effective than arguing, Gray says. Raise your hand if youve recently engaged in an insult-slinging argument that started as an attempt at a civil discussion about some hot-button issue. You may change or cancel your subscription or trial at any time online. The percentage isnt zero, but its not high, says Gray, an associate professor in psychology and neuroscience at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, where he directs the Deepest Beliefs Lab and the Center for the Science of Moral Understanding. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. In that case, call them out and give them one more chance. These cookies do not store any personal information. New APS Board Members Look to Strategic Plan, Emerging Researchers to Advance the Science, March/April 2022: The Science of Behavior Change, Behavioral Change and Science Communication: Same Planet, Worlds Apart. Three strategies to turn your adversaries into allies. The _ga cookie, installed by Google Analytics, calculates visitor, session and campaign data and also keeps track of site usage for the site's analytics report. Marketers want to change your mind about whether you need their product. Everyone is trying to change your mind on something. If those boundaries are crossed, issue a reminder. Premium Digital includes access to our premier business column, Lex, as well as 15 curated newsletters covering key business themes with original, in-depth reporting. We support credit card, debit card and PayPal payments. POWERFULL MAGIC LOVE SPELLS. And in this post-truth world of alternative facts even the US . Advice In this piece, the authors discuss three persuasion strategies leaders can employ when faced How to (actually) change someone's mind. Using terms like I agree, we all want, and I understand that can help indicate empathy. stream (USD) View Details. Tools for changing minds: inspiration, information, a phrase coined by English psychologist Peter Wason, Narrative is in a sense our native language, an exciting persuader on the difficult issue of climate change. Thats why it can be helpful to ask questions about a persons experiences, rather than their beliefs, that inform their point of viewand to avoid attacking them. What happens, Campt says, is that you often push the butterfly away by the wind you create reaching for it.. Customers became demand, or consumers or eyeballs, to be manipulated, rather than living, feeling human beings to be delighted. For example, you might start by asking someone: On a scale of 1 to 10, how strongly do you feel about gun control? If youre fired-up, and know you might snap, revisit the issue another time, Campt advises. %PDF-1.4 Leadership involves making unpopular decisions while navigating complex relationships with colleagues, partners, and clients. If you start a conversation thinking that this person hates your guts and doesnt want to listen, its going to be a bad conversation, Gray says. Say youre talking to someone who doesnt vote, he says, and youd like to change their mind. YSC cookie is set by Youtube and is used to track the views of embedded videos on Youtube pages. Three influential psychological scientists known for their work involving behavior change, intergroup relations, and memory have joined the APS Board of Directors for 20222023. Begin with praise and honest appreciation. It can help put people in an open mindset before you invite them to new thinking. You can still enjoy your subscription until the end of your current billing period. 1. Social-media users often forget theyre talking to real people, not robots devoid of feelings. experience the magic. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. YouTube sets this cookie via embedded youtube-videos and registers anonymous statistical data. Simply log into Settings & Account and select "Cancel" on the right-hand side. 3. The examples go . Dont feel bad cutting off contact, especially if the conversation has become abusive. Set by addthis.com to determine the usage of addthis.com service. Leadership storytelling doesnt always work. Without praise, it just sounds completely critical without any appreciation of the hard work done. Premium access for businesses and educational institutions. Mark's strategic work for Ogilvy and some really To write 2.5/15 as a fraction you . . Making your conversation partner feel heard is important to change their mind. Your emotional and mental health shouldnt depend on the other person changing their mind about a certain issue. Someone might get so caught up in rapid-fire replies that they forget to follow the rules governing the conversation. Audiences pick a side and enjoy the show. Often, when you pose that follow-up question, theyll pause and say, Well before delivering an explanationperhaps the first theyve ever articulated, even to themselves. Some of the data that are collected include the number of visitors, their source, and the pages they visit anonymously. The techniques used by the communicators in each case were: (a) to let Jobs explain his idea first; (b) to flatter Jobs in another area; (c) to appeal to Jobs' fighting spirit; and (d) to keep . 151 views, 1 likes, 1 loves, 5 comments, 0 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Faith Lutheran Church-Fairlawn: Livestreamed worship service You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Your strategy is to agree to the extent that you can with something embedded in their statement, even if you disagree with part of it, says Campt, who consults on areas of diversity, inclusion, and equity and is the creator of the White Ally Toolkit, an anti-racism workbook. And organizations steadily became less and less productive, as the need for innovation grew. Though it might feel satisfying in the . Can we agree to treat each other with respect and try to understand each others perspective? Most of the time, she says, people agree. This is one way to reduce people's . university cant find anywhere else. Scheherazade realised that the king had deep and powerful defences - namely the conviction . If the behavior remains problematic, block or mute. Its also OK to take breaks. In this piece, the authors discuss three persuasion strategies leaders can employ when faced with a disagreement in the workplace: the Cognitive Conversation, which is best for convincing colleagues focused . -f ? -P- -dSAFER -dCompatibilityLevel=1.4 -dAutoRotatePages=/None -dPDFSETTINGS=/ebook -dDetectDuplicateImages=true }vv$Q{h*P|vd8y`. This will help you and your conversation partner feel like youre on the same side. If people believe in falsehoods, arguments are generally not going to change their minds . Whenever a major story breaks in the social media age, from the supreme court judgement on article 50 to the news that roast potatoes can apparently cause cancer - it sparks a heated debate. It feels like we're more stubborn than ever before. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. But Dr. Karin Tamerius, a psychiatrist whos the founder of the website Smart Politicswhich teaches people how to communicate more productively and persuasivelyconsiders online platforms one of the most fruitful places for political discourse. Raise your hand if youve recently engaged in an insult-slinging argument that started as an attempt at a civil discussion about some hot-button issue. 2. 4. Explanation: To convert a decimal number into a fraction, we write the given number as the numerator and place 1 in the denominator right below the decimal point followed by the number of zeros required accordingly. Resist the temptation to directly tell the person the path they need to take. Much of leadership boils down to turning adversaries into allies. How to (Actually) Change Someone's Mind. Here are nine genius ways you can change someone's mind, according to science. He recommends opening the conversation by finding something you can both agree on. 1. It's not easy to have detractors, and it's even hard er to change their minds. APS regularly opens certain online articles for discussion on our website. Though it might feel satisfying in the moment, calling someone a bleepinginsert your favorite derogatory term hereis never going to help them understand your point of view. The more familiar the other person is with your values and the alignment between your values and your actions, the more likely that person is to trust you. There is little friction involved in convincing people who are your natural supporters. Some people will go to their grave stubbornly adhering to the same wrong-headed view, no matter what we do. Avoid shouting into the abyss and follow these steps to become a master persuader. But often, you will need to get buy-in from these constituents, and therefore you will need to convince them to change their mind. Especially now, with a higher level of polarization, its vital that we learn how to have a good conversation across different points of view., Every year, Kurt Gray asks the students in his classes if theyve had a conversation that changed their mind about subjects like abortion or immigration. Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Employees became human resources to be mined, rather than people to be minded. Not everyone can or will change their mind. Here, it's not about arguments or . For more information, please see our Community Guidelines. If youd like to retain your premium access and save 20%, you can opt to pay annually at the end of the trial. Why storytelling? Magazines, Digital If those boundaries are crossed, issue a reminder. The Scheherazade method: Seven steps to change a person's mind. Whatever your conversation partner shares, its crucial to listen non-judgmentally and with empathy, says David McRaney, author of the 2022 book How Minds Change: The Surprising Science of Belief, Opinion, and Persuasion and host of the science podcast You Are Not So Smart. The pragmatic answer given above is that almost nothing else works. or When the opposition is logical and the detractor has many rational and practical counterarguments, one has to go for a cognitive conversation. It's critical to nd the right colleague who can tactfully advocate for your positio n while maintaining a cordial relationship. Someone might get so caught up in rapid-fire replies that they forget to follow the rules governing the conversation. The cookie stores information anonymously and assigns a randomly generated number to recognize unique visitors. This cookie is used by Elastic Load Balancing from Amazon Web Services to effectively balance load on the servers. Research credentials wont resonate with science skeptics. %%+ -dEmbedAllFonts=true -dSubsetFonts=true -dCompressFonts=true -dNOPAUSE -dQUIET -dBATCH ? The same risks surround pushing your conversation partner too hard. And then I tell them, If at some point youre ready to engage in a more productive way, youre welcome to come back. I leave the door open, so they know this isnt personal., Keep a certain degree of detachment from the outcome, Have you ever tried to catch a butterfly in your hands? %%Invocation: path/gs -P- -dSAFER -dCompatibilityLevel=1.4 -q -P- -dNOPAUSE -dBATCH -sDEVICE=pdfwrite -sstdout=? Sharing personal experiences and narratives is far more likely to resonate. What characteristics are associated with the willingness (or ability) to change ones behavior for the better, and what interventions show the most promise for helping them? But it was only recently that I discovered how to actually change people's minds. Today the ongoing reinvention of management to transform workplaces from the boring, sterile, dispiriting cubicles of the 20th century into the lively centers of inspiration and creativity that are needed for the creative economy of the 21st century necessitates the elevation of leadership storytelling to the central place in leadership that it deserves. Throughout the 20th century, storytelling got little respect, but it could not be suppressed. There are ways to hold a space for this person to actually develop their first opinion about the matter, he adds. Please read our. At that point, the person youre talking to might discover their opinions arent as strong as they had thought, and that theres room for flexibility. Inevitably, some conversations will dissolve into arguments. Text. Raise your hand if you've recently engaged in an insult-slinging argument that started as an attempt at a civil discussion about some hot-button issue. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. Then, zoom in on a positive moment youve had with them, or think about some aspiration they have that you support. . In this piece, the authors discuss three persuasion strategies leaders can employ when faced with a disagreement in the workplace: the Cognitive Conversation, which is best for convincing colleagues focused on the rational reasons behind a decision, the . We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. 2. You may also opt to downgrade to Standard Digital, a robust journalistic offering that fulfils many users needs. Make Your Conversation Partner Feel Heard. Everyone has something they want to change. Its easy for someone to refute facts, but harder to refute experiences, Campt says. The story should be told by someone whom the listener trusts, or at least someone who is not actively distrusted; if the storyteller is personally distrusted, the leader may need to find someone else to tell the story. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Entering the conversation in the right mindset is keyand that means striving to be cool, calm, collected, and open to learning. Why not a 6 or a 10? In the recent research completed for Laura's book, *Edge: Turning Adversity into Advantage, we observed, and then interviewed, more than 60 leaders who were trying to convince business . Still, it is often easier said than doneespecially if they're frothing at the mouth and furiously ranting at the dinner table. Any changes made can be done at any time and will become effective at the end of the trial period, allowing you to retain full access for 4 weeks, even if you downgrade or cancel. More likely to dig in our heels, refuse to listen to facts and in general hold tight to our positions no matter what. Please login with your APS account to comment. Online, youre often anonymous, you cant see the other persons face, and its easy to misconstrue their words and intentions, Gray says. Changing People's Minds: Cognitive Conversation Approach. I let them know what Im doing and why Im doing it, Tamerius says. One has to set aside any emotion and use pure reasoning. Often, people think the best thing to do is to argue as aggressively as possible, but thats not the case. How it works: Don't jump in and try to convince the other person. Go in calm. xZ\qWewf,e,!&= ~DIB|DFFxdx_ox#;>9p%~|)sH 3C>aV/e;|8^}1)Qb=^=^t7t.p}s&$2E}OiO~_^.bWwU> QL| \WWt}~~}|v|6D7r[?~b'ncvwn . ? It made people miserable. It turned out to be a central characteristic of being human. It's always easier to listen to unpleasant things after hearing praise about our good points. Standard Digital includes access to a wealth of global news, analysis and expert opinion. By posting a comment, you agree to our Community Guidelines and the display of your profile information, including your name and affiliation. "How to (Actually) Change Someone's Mind." Harvard Business Review Digital Articles (July 31, 2020). One needs sound, logical arguments while making a good presentation, just like a lawyer. One hundred percent success in the field of persuasion simply isnt attainable. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our, Digital Humanize yourself. Ive always believed that more collaboration and happiness was possible if only people knew how to talk to each other better, says David Campt, founder of the Dialogue Company, which trains people to approach hard conversations more effectively. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. Nonprofits want to change the world. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. Read More: Its Time For White People to Have Tough Conversations With Their White Friends and Relatives. Firing facts at the person youre talking to is never going to be effective, Gray stresses. HBR recommends 3 targeted strategies. detractor's opposition, especially if the detractor feels that the credible colleague has forced them to take your side. Check if your Is it time for psychological science to incorporate tactics from public relations? Provide a "menu" of choices. It is not possible to change anyones mind. How to actually change someone's mind. 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Don't impose your point of view. () ' To get similar curated content, click on . Many of us have, and with high-stakes elections looming, thealready fiery discoursewill likely only intensify. What you want to do is create a space where you go shoulder to shoulder, and you say, I think youre a rational, reasonable person, McRaney says. Rather, experts in persuasive communication say, its crucial to focus on curiosity and compassion, and to make it clear that you dont think the person youre talking to is the enemyor look down on them. Download How To Change Someone S Mind full books in PDF, epub, and Kindle. How to (Actually) Change Someone's Mind - Read online for free. Opinions expressed by Forbes Contributors are their own. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. For a full comparison of Standard and Premium Digital, click here. by Laura Huang and Ryan Yu. Keep reading to learn how to change a person's mind. Magazines, Center for the Science of Moral Understanding, Or create a free account to access more articles. 5 0 obj During your trial you will have complete digital access to FT.com with everything in both of our Standard Digital and Premium Digital packages. Politicians want to change how you vote. Effective February 2021, you must be a logged-in APS member to post comments. For Boyd, story is a thing that does rather than a thing that is. How to Actually Change Someone's Mind. Huang, Laura, and Ryan Yu. Suppose the person responds with a 7. Sharing stories helps build trust and encourages each person to open up, while widening perspectives, Campt says. All Rights Reserved. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. When these characteristics are met, experience shows that the story has a good chance of changing minds, even people who fundamentally disagree with us. Instead, you can to use the science-based strategy described here . 77. If things start to escalate, step away with the excuse of visiting the restroom, Campt suggests, and take a moment to compose yourself before deciding whether and how to continue. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. "With trust comes the willingness to consider your viewpoint and be swayed by it," says Dr . Read More: The Art of Persuasion in a Polarized Age. Here are three ways to get naysayers onboard when you make a tough call. HBR Digital Article. Leadership involves navigating complex relationships. . Written byZLIBS Editors New York Times bestselling author of Contagious and Invisible Influence brings readers The Catalyst, a non-fiction book on how to change anyone's mind. organisation July 31, 2020. You have reached your limit of free articles. I write about 21st century leadership, Agile, innovation & narrative. If you're a leader, it's likely that not everyone who works with you will agree with the decisions you make and that's okay. 3. For proof that productive conversations on social media are rare, look no further than antagonistic Twitter threads and long-winded, belligerent Facebook comments. But the experiment was an abysmal failure in most other respects. Leadership involves making unpopular decisions while navigating complex . If somebody declares that protests against police need to stop, for example, you could agree that good police officers certainly do exist. He also suggests disclosing any nervousness or vulnerability to your conversation partner. These are very different things.If you believe that the world would be a better place if more people agreed with you, this insight will help you.I wrote this book to be read in about an . So remember to speak at a normal volume, avoid terms like "debate" or "argument," and remember that body language is a powerful . If you communicate that they should be ashamed, or that theyre stupid or gullible, theyre going to push against you in a way that ruins the possibility of moving forward to a conversation that would actually change their mind in some way or get them to reevaluate the matter, he says. Instead, invest time in personally learning about and building rapport with them. Storytelling was only one of many elements that suffered collateral damage. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. In 90% of cases, thats enough for them to immediately change their orientation, she says. In retrospect, the 20th century can be seen as a giant experiment by the human race to find out what could be accomplished if organizations treated people as things and communicated to them in abstractions, numbers, and analysis, rather than through people-friendly communications such as stories. If youre trying to change someones mind, the conversation cant be all about correcting: It has to be about connecting, Campt says. In any event, the effort to suppress storytelling was unsuccessful: storytelling, though disrespected, lived on in the cracks and crevices of societyin the cafeterias, the corridors, around water-coolers, in bars and restaurants, living rooms and bedrooms. Citation. A cookie set by YouTube to measure bandwidth that determines whether the user gets the new or old player interface. If your empathy tank is running low, Campt suggests three ways to help fill it up: First, picture the person youre talking to when they were a small child. It puts them into a different script.. In that case, call them . And how to listen to people you disagree with, so they'll listen to you. Installed by Google Analytics, _gid cookie stores information on how visitors use a website, while also creating an analytics report of the website's performance. It can be helpful, Campt adds, to keep in mind that this is the first attempt, not the onlyor finalopportunity youll have to talk. To accept or reject certain categories of cookies specifically please click the Cookie Settings link. If you're fired-up, and know you might snap . December 8, 2021. euthinktank. Let's convert 0.15 into a fraction. The person might say that no politicians actually listen; instead of telling them thats not true, share a story about a time in your life when you felt like politicians didnt hear you. How to (Actually) Change Someone's Mind. Employees want to change their bosses' minds, and leaders want to transform organizations. Salespeople want to win new clients, and startups . If you're a leader, it's likely that not everyone who works with you will agree with the decisions you make and that's okay. This cookie, set by Cloudflare, is used to support Cloudflare Bot Management. Republicans and Democrats both overestimate the extent to which the other side dehumanizes them by up to 300%, according to the findings. It is possible, but its not easy, and its not frequent.. Then, tell them another story: an experience that helped prove to you that politicians were, in fact, listeningand how you knew and why it mattered. Follow this author to stay notified about their latest stories. Find it at Harvard. Much of leadership boils down to turning adversaries into allies. By Nilofer Merchant. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience. 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how to actually change someone's mind pdf